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Cigdem Göle

Funniest Line In A Comedy Film

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"Tell me...Does your dog bite?"

Peter Sellers - The Pink Panther Strikes Again (1976)

---------

"Gentlemen you can't fight in here. This is the War Room"

Peter Sellers - Dr. Strangelove, or How I Learnt To Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1963)

Edited by Cigdem Eksi

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I just chose one of SO many classic lines from the Marx Brothers!!

Here's Chico from Duck Soup:

"Sure we shadowed him:

Tuesday we sit outside his house all day, but he no home.

Wednesday we went to the ball game, he fool us and no show up.

Thursday he go to the ball game, but we fool him and we no show up.

Friday it was a double header, nobody show up, so we stay home and listened to it on the radio."

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Guest Stephen Turner

"Thenturian, why do they titter tho"

" Romans they go the house? **** off"

" Welease woderwick....We don't have a Roderick Sir"

" He's not the Messiah, he's a very naughty Boy"

"We've got some lumps of it round the back.......E eeeees mmmmmm, mad sir, mmmmmmm,mad.

Take your pick Monty Pythons Life of Brian.

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Monty Python ...a legend.

"'Tis but a scratch'

'A scratch?! Your arm's off!'

'No, it isn't.'"

---

"He must be a king.

Why?

He hasn't got sh*t all over him."

---

"No it can't! An argument is a connected series of statements intended to establish a proposition."

-----

"He's not pining, he's passed on. This parrot is no more.

He has ceased to be. He's expired and gone to meet his maker.

He's a stiff, bereft of life, he rests in peace. If you hadn't have nailed him

to the perch he'd be pushing up the daisies. He's rung down the curtain

and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot!"

Edited by Cigdem Eksi

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From Dumb & Dumber

Harry: I expected the Rocky Mountains to be a little rockier than this.

Lloyd : I was thinking the same thing. That John Denver's full of s**t, man!

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Sonja (Diane Keaton): Oh don't, Boris, please. Sex without love is an empty experience.

Boris (Woody Allen): Yes, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.

From Love and Death (1975)

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Behind every successful man is a woman who is not married to me.

---

Except for the day before the day I met you, this is the happiest day of my life.

Al Bundy - Married With Children

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cheech and chong are pulled up by a m/c cop because their van is emitting smoke (made of compressed mexican pot) because the exhaust has set it smouldering. In desperation of changing seats while the officer bends down to sniff the smoke, c & c end up sitting in a tangle. By the time the officer reaches the drivers window he takes off his helmet, scratches his head, looks puzzeled, smiles up at the absolutely terrified duo, smiles and says '' er...is there anything I can do for you?''. Spottong a burger his eyes light up and he asks if he can have a bite. Of course ha can, wishes them a good day and walks off happily munching the burger.

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Huntz Hall at the end of a Bowery Boys movie, you know where the cast were nearing their '70's. Sach played by Huntz Hall is driving a cab. He comes to a dead stop. The car collapses -- the wheels fall off, the bumpers, the fenders. the doors, everything. A crowd has gathered.

Sach looks out the window and says, "Taxi anyone?"

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When I invite a woman to dinner, I expect her to look at my face.

That's the price she has to pay.

Groucho Marx - Night At The Opera

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Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Damn your eyes.

Igor: [to camera] Too late.

YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN

*************

Badges? We don't need some stinking badges!

BLAZING SADDLES

*************

If they could get a washing machine to fly, my Jimmy could land it.

APOLLO 13

(It was never actually said by Jim Lovell's mother, but it is still a funny line)

*************

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(Joey falls off a balcony and lands on the floor. People crowd around him to see if he is okay. He proclaims "I'm in love!")

Neil: If this is love, sex is gunna kill you

GET CRAZY

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From Bruce Almighty

(Bruce meets God)

Nice to meet you, God. Nice job on the Grand Canyon, and good luck with the apocalypse.

--------

Bruce : I needed time to reasses my goals and get in touch with my true self.

Jack : You did that in a day?

Bruce : Imagine what I could do in seven...

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In Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein, Dracula has awakened the monster and gotten him out of his shipping case. Frankenstein starts to walk and he soon sees "Wilbur" (Lou Costello) standing aside in a trance. The monster steps backwards, making frightened noises. Costello's appearance scares him.

Kathy C

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Clouseau : Do you 'ave a licounse?

Beggar : Monsieur?

Clouseau : City ordinounce 47 B prohibeads the playeng of any musical enstrument in a peublic plass for the purpose of commercial enterprise without a licounse

Beggar : I don't understand

Clouseau : It iz against the leuw for you to play yeur musical enstrument.

Beggar: The leuw?

Clouseau: What?

Beggar: You say it's against the leuw?

Clouseau: Yes, unless you 'ave a proper licounse

Beggar: What kind of license?

Clouseau: A licounce that permits the playeng of any musical enstrument in a peublic plass for the purpose of commercial enterprise

Beggar: Commercial enterprise?

Clouseau: Yes, you play that thing and the people give you the meunay

Beggar: People give the monkey the money

Clouseau: It iz a same

Beggar: Not at all monsieur, I am a musician and the monkey is a businessman, he doesn't tell me what to play and I don't tell him what to do with his money

Clouseau: Monsieur, don't try to be feunnay with me!! It iz yeur minkey therefore it iz yeur meunay!

Beggar: He lives with me but he is not my monkey, one day I came home and I found him sitting in the living room, Ilet him stay but he pays for his own room

Clouseau: Then the minkey's breaking the leuw

Beggar: But he doesn't play any musical instrument

Clouseau: City ordinounce 132 R prohibeads the beggingg!

Beggar: How do you know so much about the city ordinances?

Clouseau: What sort of stupid question is that, are you blind?

Beggar: Yes

The Return of the Pink Panther (1975)

Edited by Cigdem Göle

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