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America used the Osmands to establish corporate dominance in Britain.


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Guest Stephen Turner
Posted (edited)

Britain in the 1960s was a country full of confidence in itself, exports were at record levels(if you discount the previous forty years) everyone lived in a Castle, with twenty Butlers, harold Wilson had invented the Pill, allowing young Britains to have sexual intercourse at the drop of a hat, Australians, tired of never ending drink and drug orgies, were flocking to the Mother land to wait in Pubs, and a new Government incentive meant that anyone between the Ages of 15 to 25 was given a recording contract. But, envious eyes were watching.

Across the "pond" America (hereto after refered to as "Ex Colonials") was in a bad way, Gangs of toughened suberbanites roamed the Cities, burning down petrol stations at will, Joe Dimaggio was still missing, and the president had lost his razor, but, worse than all this, a veritable mountain of unsold Cheese burgers were rotting in the streets, due to everybody being too fraught with anxiety to eat them. It was at this perilous juncture that a plan was hatched, Force the Godam limey's to eat the cheese burgers, and thus establish corporate dominance without having to fire a shot.

In part two I will explain how this was achieved. Please feel free to add your comments.

Edited by Stephen Turner
Guest Stephen Turner
Posted (edited)

Enter the Osmonds. they were not, as most supposed, a harmless group of Mormon songsters, but hardened ideological warriors, trained by brainwashing specialists at Quantico. Their aim was threefold, one, make enough money to buy Nixon an electric razor, a good battery powered one, Two, make Britains feel bad about the state of their teeth. (The Osmonds teeth were not real, but were projected onto their faces by a powerful laser, or something like that.) Three, encourage Brits to turn their backs on healthy, traditional food( Tripe, blood pudding, mashed eel etc) and get them to eat the calorie laden Burgers, by brainwashing them through their songs.

Puppy Love. This song was so insipid that many Brits were physically sick upon hearing it, thus empyting their stomach's of food, and making them easy prey to bands of roaming cheese burger "salesmen"

Crazy Horses. This was not, as many supposed,an ecological, anti car song, but rather a psychological body blow against the famouse British butcher chain, Kray Zee, horses and Sons, who specialised in selling healthy, low carb horse meat. The video of the song is purest black ops.

long haired lover from Liverpool Well, its just xxxxe isn't it.

In part three, I shall reveal how Ronald McDonald was responsible for the Cannary warf bombing campaign.

Edited by Stephen Turner
Guest Stephen Turner
Posted (edited)

With a couple of unrealistic mice from the "Uncle Disney" psy ops studio. Can't you just feel the evil?

Edited by Stephen Turner
Posted (edited)

While The Osmonds were carrying on their secret mission along with The Beach Boys,

MI5 recruited three brothers to reciprocate. Barry, Maurice and Robin were among the

most successful agents who were full of enthusiasm. The good thing was they were also

into disco music. Every evening after work, they sang and danced together in their bedrooms.

They even had a name for their band (The Bee Geeks), which noone except their mother knew.

They needed little training for the mission since they were already musicians. They released many

albums, gave numerous concerts all over the world including America but Americans didn't like them.

They didn't buy their LPs or go to their concerts. The mission was a failure. It was devastating for

MI5. They didn't know what to do or how to explain the high cost of helium, which was inhaled

by the band members before each concert and studio recording session to cover their terrible voices.

Edited by Cigdem Eksi
Guest Stephen Turner
Posted
Stephen,

You seem to be promoting a "McDisney" conspiracy. That's exactly what I expected from you and your ilk. You start off with an idea, born in that suspicious-to-the-point-of-paranoia mind of yours, and in your implausible attempts at expansion of your view, you must add others into the mix, up to and including Mickey Mouse. Have you NO shame, sir?

I am certain you will, at some point, accuse the French of a "Frye" conspiracy.

I'm onto your McMind games, Buddy.

Kathy

Kathy, Mickey and Minnie were simply unwitting dupes, like Nixon, they too had their paymasters, and believe me, it wasn't the good folks at Dunkin Doughnuts.

Oh and by the way, the French couldn't organise "Un pisse dans une Brasserie"

Guest Stephen Turner
Posted (edited)

And don't be taken in my fellow Brits, here's what they REALLY think. Special relationship, SURE.

Britain in the Sixties, Happy, innovative, self assured and swinging.

Britain in the Seventies, strike bound, broke, power cuts and Gary Glitter.

Can it be a coincidence that the seventies were the decade of The Osmands, The Partridge Family and The Fonz.

BTW, KFC opened its first British outlet in London in...............1971.

Edited by Stephen Turner
Posted
And don't be taken in my fellow Brits, here's what they REALLY think. Special relationship, SURE.

Britain in the Sixties, Happy, innovative, self assured and swinging.

Britain in the Seventies, strike bound, broke, power cuts and Gary Glitter.

Can it be a coincidence that the seventies were the decade of The Osmands, The Partridge Family and The Fonz.

BTW, KFC opened its first British outlet in London in...............1971.

Stephen, I guess our resident Larouche devotee doesn't read this section. May I inject that Britain only sucked in the seventies to throw Larouche and his detectives off its trail? Sort of a "limited hang-out" if you will. Always one step ahead.

Only thing is... I can't figure out who's to blame for the whole punk thing. I'd like to say the Sex Pistols and The Clash, but something tells me they'd point back to the Ramones, New York Dolls, and Stooges, who'd in turn point back to the Stones, who'd in turn point back to Chuck Berry, Muddy Waters, and Howlin' Wolf. Hmmm...

OH THAT'S RIGHT... Howlin' Wolf was totally gaga over Vera Lynn!

Guest Stephen Turner
Posted
And don't be taken in my fellow Brits, here's what they REALLY think. Special relationship, SURE.

Britain in the Sixties, Happy, innovative, self assured and swinging.

Britain in the Seventies, strike bound, broke, power cuts and Gary Glitter.

Can it be a coincidence that the seventies were the decade of The Osmands, The Partridge Family and The Fonz.

BTW, KFC opened its first British outlet in London in...............1971.

Stephen, I guess our resident Larouche devotee doesn't read this section. May I inject that Britain only sucked in the seventies to throw Larouche and his detectives off its trail? Sort of a "limited hang-out" if you will. Always one step ahead.

Only thing is... I can't figure out who's to blame for the whole punk thing. I'd like to say the Sex Pistols and The Clash, but something tells me they'd point back to the Ramones, New York Dolls, and Stooges, who'd in turn point back to the Stones, who'd in turn point back to Chuck Berry, Muddy Waters, and Howlin' Wolf. Hmmm...

OH THAT'S RIGHT... Howlin' Wolf was totally gaga over Vera Lynn!

Pat, the punk thing was, to be fair, our own fault, it was payback time for trying to inflict Cliff Richard and the Shadows on you in the early sixties, a kind of musical pre-emptive strike.

Guest Stephen Turner
Posted (edited)

Study these two pictures, the first taken in London, the Family look overweight and cold, with Marie holding a "Brolly" subtext? Its cold wet and miserable in Britain. and the food is unspeakable and makes us fat. Unlike.

Picture two, taken in Moosejaw Alabama, the family look happy and slim, with a breeze ruffling their hair. subtext? Its always lovely and warm in America, and we eat healthy food.

Edited by Stephen Turner

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