My Brother never went to Egypt.

[Guest Stephen Turner]

I'd like to bring to your attention two Egyptian words that will answer your question about mocassins being made to fit concave feet.

The first word is "KA" -- meaning a disembodied spirit or ghost.

The second is "NADA" -- meaning the region of eternal nothingness and whiteness (sometimes known in Colloquial Egyptian as "Zip").

Anyone famillar with these matters will know that these two fit together like a Scotsman and sheep.

Hence the thus far secret meaning behind the word KANADA -- the region of nothingness inhabited but absolutely nothing other than ghosts.

Ever heard of the tribes of the Five Nations (the Iroquois Confederacy) performing a Ghost Dance?

I rest my case. Almost.

Scotland and Kanada are Egyptian. If further proof were needed, I offer the Native American Teepee, a triangular shaped erection as per the following image:

http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l30/sere...ipigraphic0.jpg

The gentleman standing to the left of the triangular shaped erection, is "Shy-Ann", a Native American Egscotian (ha, even the mightily strange European way of spelling Scotland, "Ecosse" begins with an "E" - just like "Egypt" does). Keen observers will note he is rolling a ritual-tobacco-cum-narcotic tubular roll widely used in Egypt as described in the "Scottish Book of Sheep Rearing, Egyptian Tent Building and Ritual Herb Fume".

Snuff said.

David

AND!!!

The word NORWICH, when spoken does not rhyme as NOR-WHICH, but rather NORIDGE, as in PORIDGE, more "Scotish" influence.

LOWESTOFT, Break it down, LOWEST, impossible to get lower than, and OFT, olde English for often, so Lowestoft quite literally means "Often lower than any thing else" IE HELL!!!!

YARMOUTH, YAR, Yuppie "Yes" MOUTH, hole, add in the word GREAT, and what you have is GREAT YES HOLE, YESOGOTH was the name horror writer Edgar alen Poe used to refer to the GREAT SATAN. so---GREAT SATAN HOLE, IE HELL.........

[Dave Greer]

I've just read through this thread again, and I'm starting to convince myself we really ARE onto something...

A WARNING TO THOSE WHO ARE OF A FAINT-HEARTED DISPOSITION: the information I am about to present to you will rock you to your core, and shake your pre-conceived beliefs to their very foundations. I sat aghast for several minutes when I stumbled upon this information. I can't wait to hear what my mate Bob from down the pub will have to say about this one...

To recap. We now have irrefutable proof that the Scots are involved in the great pyranot conspiracy, which is brewing hotter than a trapper's stove. I SHALL NOW PROVIDE EVIDENCE LINKING THE GREAT PYRANOT CONSPIRACY TO DEVIL-WORSHIP, AND AN ATTEMPT TO CORRUPT THE WORLD'S YOUTH.

Firstly, please examine the following photograph. Incredibly, it is a photo of a pyranot in Stirling, Scotland - located in a cemetery. It's name? Star Pyramid. Nothing suspiscious there you may think. But curiously, it is also called SALEM ROCK.

Source

The 16th century cemetery which lies below the esplanade of Stirling Castle, is to be restored at a cost of £1.67 million. Within the cemetery stands the Church of the Holy Rude, the last remaining Scots church to have staged a Coronation - that of the infant King James VI in 1567. The cemetery also houses an unusual structure known as the Star Pyramid or Salem Rock, with Scripture texts and symbolical designs as a memorial to the Covenanters. The project by Stirling Council forms part of a vision to make Stirling's Old Town an attractive urban heritage site which will complement other attractions in this area, such as the Old Town Jail, Mars Walk and the Church of the Holy Rude - all within walking distance of Stirling Castle.

Salem Rock? As I'm sure you're aware, there is a town in Salem, Virginia renowned for its Witch trials in the 17th Century. What you may not know, is that there is also ANOTHER Salem located in Oregon. My studies have revealed that located just TWO MILES from Salem, Oregon, is what appears at first glance to be a huge pyranot site, in a town called Keizer. Here are some images from Google Earth proving this.

How on earth would it be possible to have such a complex system of pyranots and related outbuildings located just two miles from Salem without raising suspicion? My intensive studies have discovered that this complex is cunningly disguised as a skate-park.

I'll spell it out: the last coronation in Scotland was held in a the Church of the Holy Rude (surely a made-up name if ever I heard one): in the CEMETERY of this churchyard stands a PYRANOT called SALEM ROCK. SALEM was renowned for WITCHCRAFT and DEVIL WORSHIP. Two miles from SALEM, OREGON, there is a network of PYRANOTS cunningly disguised as a skateboard park.

THEY'RE CORRUPTING THE WORLD, AND THEY'RE STARTING WITH OUR CHILDREN.

Curiously, "Salem Oregon" is an anagram of "Lager me soon", which is my mate Bob's favourite catchphrase! He WILL laugh at that one!

Seriously kids - stay away from skateboard parks. And Scottish cemeteries. And Great Yarmouth.

IS NOWHERE SAFE????

[Guest David Guyatt]

I think we’re really getting somewhere now.

If you draw a line from Cairo to Edinburgh, and a line from Edinburgh to Great Yarmouth and a further line from Great Yarmouth back to Cairo, you get a perfect equilateral triangle (but only if you’ve been smoking Sheep brand Egscotian ritual tobacco tubes).

Also, notice in the following photograph, the small, thin, trail of smoke curling heavenward from another Egscotian ritual tobacco tube. If this isn’t a CHEMTRAIL I don’t know what is:

http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l30/sere...ow/C2558-19.jpg

Lastly, and to prove beyond a shadow of all possible doubt of the reality of these interrelationships, I leave you with this image:

http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l30/sere...bow/camfilt.gif

If anyone really wants to get me going, they need only mention Marlboro, the smoke of choice of the Ku Klux Klan. The Scottish origin of the Ku Klux Klan is known to only a small number of people and no klansman (sshhh, it’s a secret). The KKK are otherwise known as the Ku Ku Clainn or Cuculainn (tribe of the Dog of the White Way). And remember this, knights of the Ku Klux Klan wear pointy hats – triangular hats.

It all perfectly fits, init.

Btw, the Scots, as is made clear in their kingly “Declaration of Arbroath”, came to Scotland from Greater Scythia – in other words Eurasia -- and are, therefore, Iranian in origin.

If you’ve ever seen the pattern on an Arab scarf, known as a Shemagh, you’ll recognise the pattern as being identically not dissimilar to tartan – except Arabs traditionally wear these garments on their heads whereas the Scots, being Scottish, wear them to keep their brains warm… J

Pyramids built in Ancient Iran are called Ziggurats and are a temple tower built in the form of stepped pyramids.

The buildings at the University of East Anglia in Nor-Wich are constructed in a rip-off Ziggurat style.

So, Stephen you’re double damned!

David

[Jack White]

Why is off-topic crap like this allowed

and on-topic crap like "Folsom's" censored?

This forum has been taken over by the inmates.

Nonsense reigns.

Jack

Edited July 1, 2007 by Jack White

[Mike Tribe]

Why is off-topic crap like this allowed

and on-topic crap like "Folsom's" censored?

This forum has been taken over by the inmates.

Nonsense reigns.

Jack

If the cap fits...

[Guest Stephen Turner]

Why is off-topic crap like this allowed

and on-topic crap like "Folsom's" censored?

This forum has been taken over by the inmates.

Nonsense reigns.

Jack

If the cap fits...

Oh crap on a biscuit, ITS A F****** LAUGH FOR GAWDS SAKE. Still, if can get up Peoples noses as diffuse in their opinons as jack and Craig its all in a good cause as far as I'm concerned.

AND I STILL SAY "MY BROTHER NEVER WENT TO EGYPT"

[Guest David Guyatt]

Look, Stephen, let's be perfectly honest here. Your brother DID go to Egypt! You know it, I know it and your brother knows it. He's got the Scottish Fez and a packet of smoking Camels to prove it. I found his footprint a the base of the Giza pyramid and Said, down the Souk, caught him trying to palm off a box of American made tarot cards as authentic ancient Egyptian stone stellae-cum-treasure he said he found in an off-topic crap pot hidden in the sand beneath the King's Chamber.

So knock off the innocence will ya!

David

PS, If anyone requires an off-topic crap humour implant, the ever joyous and gnomic citizens of Zurich are handing them out for free to celebrate their uproarious annual "comic fondue" carnival. Irresistible larfs all round.

[Guest Stephen Turner]

Look, Stephen, let's be perfectly honest here. Your brother DID go to Egypt! You know it, I know it and your brother knows it. He's got the Scottish Fez and a packet of smoking Camels to prove it. I found his footprint a the base of the Giza pyramid and Said, down the Souk, caught him trying to palm off a box of American made tarot cards as authentic ancient Egyptian stone stellae-cum-treasure he said he found in an off-topic crap pot hidden in the sand beneath the King's Chamber.

So knock off the innocence will ya!

David

HA HA!!, Spoken like the fully payed up shill for the Egyptian tourist board that you are.

Mind you, the bit about him flogging Tarot cards to Yankie tourists sounds familiar. he once palmed a stick of Yarmouth rock onto a visitor claiming it was Moses's second best walking stick.

[Guest David Guyatt]

"Who really is Kathy Beckett Really".

It just so happens I outed her in the lock-up thread she was talking about. I even published a picture. Unknown to the world in general Beckett's actual middle name is "Margaret" -- and she doubles as former Brit Foreign Secretary, Dracula maid, Caravan Club member and orthodontists playmate of the year. Very cunning, eh.

See for yourself:

Note the subtle changes in make-up and the recrafting of facial bones to create the illusion that there are TWO Becketts when there is only one. Note also the allusion to "Caravans" - a coded hint for Caravans of the desert --- Camels! Clearly, Beckett is Egyptian and, therefore, someone I should -- nay MUST - help to promote in my role of honourary shill for the Egyptian Tourist Board, of which I am duly proud, I have to say.

David

PS, Stephen, I haven't yet received my promised red Fez bearing the official seal of the Egyptian Tourist Board? Should I:

a) Write to Cairo?

Wait for the postal strike backlog to clear?

c) Buy my own red Fez?

d) Make my own red Fez?

e) Locate Tommy Cooper's red Fez?

Or

f) Forget the f*ck*ng Fez and get a proper job?

(please circle only one of the choices above and send it with a banknote not smaller than £20.00 to Red Fez Competition, c/0 Thirsty Blighty TV Hamper Productions, P O Box 500, London. Additional folding money donations to Save The Camel fund will be expended in a certain wine bar near Fleet Street

Signed: El Vino's.

Drinkers to Das Queen

Edited July 3, 2007 by David Guyatt

[Dave Greer]

I've long had my suspicions about Kathy Beckett and her intentions. She comes on this forum, all smiles and full of good intentions, which immediately raises my suspicions. She's only been a member for 6 months and has somehow managed to weasel her way into being a moderator. She's even taken to trying to befriend me PM! As my proctologist mate Bob from the pub always tells me, "Keep your friends close, and your enemas closer".

My investigations have revealed some rather ominous "coincidences".

I urge the good members of this forum to perform their own Google image search of "Kathy Beckett", because I couldn't believe what I was seeing when I did. I was expecting to see her treacherous smile beaming out at me, so imagine my surprise when instead, the VERY FIRST IMAGE is what appears to be a distant photograph of a pyra-not partially hidden by trees. There are some other peculiar oddities in this photo - why are there no reflections of the trees in the water?

It's no surprise to me that KANSAS KATHLEEN BECKETT is an anagram of THAT BLACKEST, KEEN SNAKE. Quite appropriate for someone lower than a snake's belly.

My question to you Kathy is - what do you know about these pyra-nots that you're not letting on?

Edited July 3, 2007 by Dave Greer

[Guest Stephen Turner]

PS, Stephen, I haven't yet received my promised red Fez bearing the official seal of the Egyptian Tourist Board? Should I:

a) Write to Cairo?

Wait for the postal strike backlog to clear?

c) Buy my own red Fez?

d) Make my own red Fez?

e) Locate Tommy Cooper's red Fez?

Or

f) Forget the f*ck*ng Fez and get a proper job?

(please circle only one of the choices above and send it with a banknote not smaller than £20.00 to Red Fez Competition, c/0 Thirsty Blighty TV Hamper Productions, P O Box 500, London. Additional folding money donations to Save The Camel fund will be expended in a certain wine bar near Fleet Street

Signed: El Vino's.

Drinkers to Das Queen

David, Given the above I think you should attempt to create your very own. bluepeter/makeafez/@petraliveson.com Aunty Val will show you how. BTW, did you know that John Noakes worked for MI5 during the 60s and 70s, helping to poison young, potentially radical minds with constant references to "sticky backed plastic"

[Guest David Guyatt]

I se exactly what you mean, Dave. When your most interesting picture is lightened, using special Egyptian spells from the Egyptian Book of Knitting, we have this:

And if that isn't sufficient to make you gasp, then this one of the Egyptian Becket relaxing will:

I rest my case of Amon Tillado.

Signed,

A-Tum-Tum

[Guest David Guyatt]

Cathy the Egyptian asks and I deliver (from an off board exchange about the benefits of being Egyptian):

It's good to be an Egyptian. Not only do you instinctively know how to read palms [ guffaw! ] as well as tarot cards -- after all how do you think Gypsies acquired their distinctive title i.e., E-Gypt-sies (true actually), you also get to wear a red fez... On the Englishness of Egypty, we have to dig back into the mists of time and realise three things that most folk have no knowledge of:

1) When God created Egypt, we English were already there playing cricket, drinking sherry, wearing handkerchiefs on our head and rolling up our grey flannel trousers to our knees so as to facilitate building castles in the sand.

2) The Egyptians would've been able to build proper castles if they'd followed out clear and precise instructions but they chose to hammer meaningless glyphs into stone edifices instead (I mean, Doh! or what?) and this and other lapses in concentration meant they ended up only building three cornered buildings. You can bring civilisation to the savage but not the savage to civilisation...

3) We taught them to speak good and proper English, as revealed to us by GOD, but look what good that act of simple generosity achieved. NADA. Their native tongue being a "forgotten" language. I ask you...

***

For those dim enough not to know the true geography of England, "God's shore" in this material dimension, here is the map:

David

[John Dolva]

Cathy the Egyptian asks and I deliver (from an off board exchange about the benefits of being Egyptian):

It's good to be an Egyptian. Not only do you instinctively know how to read palms [ guffaw! ] as well as tarot cards -- after all how do you think Gypsies acquired their distinctive title i.e., E-Gypt-sies (true actually), you also get to wear a red fez... On the Englishness of Egypty, we have to dig back into the mists of time and realise three things that most folk have no knowledge of:

1) When God created Egypt, we English were already there playing cricket, drinking sherry, wearing handkerchiefs on our head and rolling up our grey flannel trousers to our knees so as to facilitate building castles in the sand.

2) The Egyptians would've been able to build proper castles if they'd followed out clear and precise instructions but they chose to hammer meaningless glyphs into stone edifices instead (I mean, Doh! or what?) and this and other lapses in concentration meant they ended up only building three cornered buildings. You can bring civilisation to the savage but not the savage to civilisation...

3) We taught them to speak good and proper English, as revealed to us by GOD, but look what good that act of simple generosity achieved. NADA. Their native tongue being a "forgotten" language. I ask you...

***

For those dim enough not to know the true geography of England, "God's shore" in this material dimension, here is the map:

David

Stephens brother never went to Egypt!

Because::

He (and Steve) have always been there! (as well as the rest of us, apart from the Canadanauts which is really the same thing anyway.)

Just look at the 'Pine Tree' itself, couldn't get more pyranautical than that surely.

http://www.ashcroftfarm.com/images/Scotch%20pine.jpg

Edited July 5, 2007 by John Dolva

[Guest Stephen Turner]

Stephens brother never went to Egypt!

Because::

He (and Steve) have always been there! [/b

John, is this in a metaphysical sence, or pertaining to a reality

And dont think its escaped my notice how you have all avoided the topic of "BLUE PETER" or, to give it its MI5 code name "B/PEE" This mockingbird of a programme has been warping impressionable young minds since 1958, and shows no sign of stopping. It has survived countless scandles, Presenters caught sniffing coke, rigged phone ins and most tellingly a baby Elephant urinating on the studio floor, whilst dragging its "Handler" through some feaces it had deposited earlier, all more than enough to get a regular programme removed from airtime, but not B/P not on your life. It constantly pushes an ultra Conservative viewpoint, encouraging religious beliefs, through "Carol services" which bang on endlessly about God, and the Baby Jesus, whilst the wholesomeness of the presenters is terrible to behold in its cultural authodoxy.

Many who have worked on the programme have been intellegence co travellers at the very least, and in two cases, Valerie Singleton, and the obnoxious John Noakes fully paid up agents. The cultural hegemony of this ultra establishment show cannot be over stated.......But I guess you all prefer not to talk about it......Very telling