John Simkin Posted July 2, 2009 Author Share Posted July 2, 2009 It is ridiculous to say that men cannot multi-task. I know several men who can make love and think of another woman at the same time. A married man once told me that he was invited back to the hotel room of a very attractive woman. He was so excited he could not perform. He solved the problem by thinking about his wife. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Dolva Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 I think a better solution is to think of the British Empire. Then you dont have to bother getting exited in the first place Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cigdem Göle Posted August 23, 2009 Share Posted August 23, 2009 Perfect English Doctor's office, Rome: Specialist In Women and Other Diseases In an elevator, China : Be sure not to take lift when on fire. In a hotel, Japan : You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid. Dry Cleaners, Bangkok: Drop your trousers here for the best results. In a Nairobi restaurant: Customers who find our waitresses rude ought to see the manager. Tokyo Hotel's rules and regulations: Guests are requested not to smoke or do other disgusting behaviours in bed. In the lobby of a Moscow hotel : You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday. Airline ticket office, Copenhagen: We take your bags and send them in all directions. In a shop in Ephesus, Turkey: Genuine Fake Watches Outside a Paris clothes shop: Dresses for street walking. In an elevator, Malta: Attention In an Emergency When the lift stops because of power cut,do not be afraid but stay calm. Do not touch the door nor the pushes of numbers 0,1,2,3. But you have to shout until somebody hears you. In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist: Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists. In a Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty. From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Simkin Posted October 29, 2009 Author Share Posted October 29, 2009 An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great.. I would recommend it very highly.' The other man said, 'What is the name of the restaurant?' The first man thought and thought and finally said, 'What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know.... The one that's red and has thorns..' 'Do you mean a rose?' 'Yes, that's the one,' replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, 'Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathleen Collins Posted October 29, 2009 Share Posted October 29, 2009 I laughed my ass off at this. It's a Jerry Lewis impersonator and the concept is Jerry's selling an album of his songs. Every song has the word "lady" in it. It's under 2 minutes and it's hysterical. Kathy C Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cigdem Göle Posted November 23, 2009 Share Posted November 23, 2009 Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Dolva Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 monty python bruce sketch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 monty python bruce sketch and more in keeping with what goes on here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gb_qHP7VaZE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Dolva Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 monty python bruce sketch and more in keeping with what goes on here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gb_qHP7VaZE and this one too... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 monty python bruce sketch and more in keeping with what goes on here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gb_qHP7VaZE and this one too... precisely. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Simkin Posted February 11, 2010 Author Share Posted February 11, 2010 monty python bruce sketch and more in keeping with what goes on here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gb_qHP7VaZE Of course, Terry Jones, who wrote this scene, is a conspiracy theorist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 monty python bruce sketch and more in keeping with what goes on here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gb_qHP7VaZE Of course, Terry Jones, who wrote this scene, is a conspiracy theorist. That must be evidence of something I am sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evan Burton Posted February 12, 2010 Share Posted February 12, 2010 What's the difference between Iceland and Ireland? 6 months and a letter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Dolva Posted February 12, 2010 Share Posted February 12, 2010 (edited) You've gotta explain that one, Evan. (our scandinavian jokes from my childhood in scandinavia were different). One I heard here in Oz I like . two danes, two swedes, two norwegians and two finns were stranded on a desert isle. After a year the danes had started a furniture co-op, the norwegians a fishing fleet, the finns a still and the swedes wern't talking because they hadn't been introduced yet. Edited February 12, 2010 by John Dolva Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evan Burton Posted February 12, 2010 Share Posted February 12, 2010 I heard that it's the latest financial joke, highlighting the financial woes of the two countries. It appears Ireland is suffering the same fate that happened to Iceland. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Please sign in to comment
You will be able to leave a comment after signing in
Sign In Now