MAINSTREAM COOLER - For those who believe mainstream contemporary facts.

[Leslie Sharp]

5 minutes ago, W. Niederhut said:

I'm re-printing this article from this evening's WaPo for non-subscribers.

Good for some laughs.  🤪

Worried by Florida’s history standards? Check out its new dictionary!

By Alexandra Petri

July 28, 2023

Well, it’s a week with a Thursday in it, and Florida is, once again, revising its educational standards in alarming ways. Not content with removing books from shelves, or demanding that the College Board water down its AP African American studies curriculum, the state’s newest history standards include lessons suggesting that enslaved people “developed skills” for “personal benefit.” This trend appears likely to continue. What follows is a preview of the latest edition of the dictionary to be approved in Florida.

Aah: (exclamation) Normal thing to say when you enter the water at the beach, which is over 100 degrees.

Abolitionists: (noun) Some people in the 19th century who were inexplicably upset about a wonderful free surprise job training program. Today they want to end prisons for equally unclear reasons.
 

Abortion: (noun) Something that male state legislators (the foremost experts on this subject) believe no one ever wants under any circumstances, probably; decision that people beg the state to make for them and about which doctors beg for as little involvement as possible.

American history: (noun) A branch of learning that concerns a ceaseless parade of triumphs and contains nothing to feel bad about.

Barbie: (noun) Feminist demon enemy of the state.

Biden, Joe: (figure) Illegitimate president.

Black history: (entry not found)

Blacksmith: (noun) A great job and one that enslaved people might have had. Example sentence from Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis (R): “They’re probably going to show that some of the folks that eventually parlayed, you know, being a blacksmith into doing things later in life.”

Book ban: (noun) Effective way of making sure people never have certain sorts of ideas.

Censorship: (noun) When other people get mad about something you’ve said. Not to be confused with when you remove books from libraries or the state tells colleges what can and can’t be said in classrooms (both fine).

Child: (noun) Useful laborer with tiny hands; alternatively, someone whose reading cannot be censored enough.

Christian nationalism: (noun) Certainly constitutional; probably what the Founding Fathers would have preferred!

Classified: (adjective) The government’s way of saying a paper is especially interesting and you ought to have it in your house.

Climate change: (noun) Conspiracy by scientists to change all the thermometers, fill the air with smoke and then blame us.

Cocaine: (noun) A substance discovered in the White House; the only fit subject for news cycles.

Constitution: (noun) A document that can be interpreted only by Trump-appointed and/or Federalist Society judges. If the Constitution appears to prohibit something that you want to do, take the judge on a boat and try again.

Coral: (noun) Superfluous refuge for fish, others who have failed to adapt to life on land.

DeSantis, Ron: (figure) Governor who represents the ideal human being. Pronunciation varies.

Disney: (noun) A corporation, but not the good kind.

DOJ: (noun) Schrodinger’s legal entity that is both good and evil simultaneously, used for investigating legitimate country-shaking crimes (Hunter Biden possessing a firearm) and conducting illegal raids (Donald Trump kindly opening his home to some classified documents).

Election: (noun) Binding if Republicans win; otherwise, needs help from election officials who will figure out where the fraud was that prevented the election from reflecting the will of the people (that Republicans win).

Elector: (noun) Someone Mike Pence should or should not have accepted, depending.

Emancipation Proclamation: (noun) Classic example of government overreach.

Firearm: (noun) Wonderful, beautiful object that every person ought to have six of, except Hunter Biden.

Florida: God’s paradise on Earth; sometimes Ohio; see “The Courage to Be Free”! All parts of the country at once. Real estate here will only get more valuable.

FOX: News.

Free speech: (noun) When you shut up and I talk.

Gun violence: (noun) Simple, unalterable fact of life, like death but unlike taxes.

Alexandra Petri: We will stop at nothing to protect the children

Immigration: (noun) When someone leaves their country of origin to seek a better life elsewhere; huge insult to the receiving country, to be prevented at all costs.

Independence Day: See Jan. 6.

Jan. 6: (noun) A day when some beautiful, beloved people took a nice, uneventful tour of the U.S. Capitol.

King Jr., Martin Luther: (figure) A man who, as far as we can discern, uttered only one famous quotation ever and it was about how actually anytime you tried to suggest that people were being treated differently based on skin color you were the real racist. Sample sentence: “Dr. King would be enraged at the existence of Black History Month.”

Liberty: (noun) My freedom to choose what you can read (see Moms for Liberty).

Moms for Liberty: (noun) Censors, but the good kind.

Nature: (noun) Something it is okay to boil, probably. Like soup.

Orca: (noun) Enemy of the state, vessels.

Orwellian: (adjective) When people are mad about a book written by Josh Hawley or another Republican, not when people try to erase slavery from history.

Pregnant (adjective): The state of being a vessel containing a Future Citizen; do not say “pregnant person”; no one who is a real person can get pregnant.

Queer: (entry not found)

Refugee: (noun) Someone who should have stayed put and waited for help to come.

Slavery: (noun) We didn’t invent it, or it wasn’t that bad, or it was a free job training program.

Supreme Court: (noun) Wonderful group of mostly men without whom no journey by private plane or yacht is complete.

Trans: (entry not found)

United States: (noun) Perfect place, no notes.

Unfree: (adjective) The best way for thought and people to be.

Tragicomic (with a strong dose of hilarity!)

[Matt Allison]

Trump Is an Extremely Dumb Fascist

The latest criminal indictment highlights his idiocy—but also the threat he still poses to American democracy.

 

 

 

https://newrepublic.com/post/174706/indictment-trump-complete-fascist

 

 

[W. Niederhut]

8 hours ago, Matt Allison said:

Trump Is an Extremely Dumb Fascist

The latest criminal indictment highlights his idiocy—but also the threat he still poses to American democracy.

 

 

 

https://newrepublic.com/post/174706/indictment-trump-complete-fascist

 

 

But...but what about Biden's "murderous turpitude?" 🤥

And what about Ben Cole's redundant MAGA trope about the equivalence of Donks and 'Phants?

[Douglas Caddy]

U.S. Hunts Chinese Malware That Could Disrupt American Military Operations – DNyuz

[Douglas Caddy]

 

 

Putin will be gone within a year and the West MUST be ready for his terrifying replacement, warns ex-MI6 spy | The US Sun (the-sun.com)

[Douglas Caddy]

Not to be missed. History you will always remember.

 

“He did not speak the ordinary language”: Memories of Oppie, from a Manhattan Project physicist - Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists (thebulletin.org)

[Steve Thomas]

Trump Handed Another Loss as Judge Dismisses His ‘Big Lie’ CNN Lawsuit

The former president’s claim that CNN likened him to Adolf Hitler by referring to ‘the Big Lie’ has officially flopped.

byJosh Fiallo July. 29, 2023

https://www.thedailybeast.com/trumps-big-lie-cnn-defamation-lawsuit-is-dismissed?ref=home?ref=home

“Trump was demanding $475 million in the suit, which was filed in the Southern District of Florida—the jurisdiction that covers Mar-a-Lago, his Palm Beach estate.

The former president had pointed to five instances where “the Big Lie” was used to describe his unfounded election claims—some stated live on air, others in opinion pieces published on CNN’s website.

[Judge] Singhal acknowledged, “bad rhetoric is not defamation when it does not include false statements of fact.” And, as its been proven in numerous recounts and audits, Trump’s claims about the 2020 election were indeed lies.””

 

BIG LIE! BIG LIE! BIG LIE!

NANNY, NANNY BOO BOO

YOU’RE A BIG xxxx!

 

(Trump’s lawyers are going, “Go ahead and file another stupid lawsuit. I don’t care. I’m getting rich in the process.”

 

Steve Thomas

[W. Niederhut]

Trump's Tiny White Balls-- New GOP Health Supplement!

 

[Matt Allison]

6 hours ago, W. Niederhut said:

But...but what about Biden's "murderous turpitude?" 🤥

And what about Ben Cole's redundant MAGA trope about the equivalence of Donks and 'Phants?

I understand Matthew Koch is posting his nonsense again as well? LOL

The MAGAs are getting more and more desperate as they see their L00ny criminal heroes finally facing consequences.

Boo hoo.

[Douglas Caddy]

[Steve Thomas]

Wall Street Journal urges GOP to dump Trump over his 'truly stupid' Mar-a-Lago cover-up
By Tom Boggioni July 29, 2023
https://www.rawstory.com/trump-mar-a-lago-indictment-2662555739/
"...the editors (of the Wall St. Journal)  made a strong case that GOP lawmakers should be furious with the former president for what he has put them through for years now.

"Republicans should also be angry at Mr. Trump, who is again the architect of his own destruction. He led the GOP to defeats, many of them driven by his personal grievances, in 2018, 2020, 2021 and 2022. Add his Covid performance, the Jan. 6 riot, a $5 million civil jury verdict for sexual abuse, plus now a truly stupid alleged Mar-a-Lago coverup," they wrote before continuing, "Yet Mr. Trump still expects the GOP will save him from his own recklessness by nominating him for the White House a third time. He wants Republican voters, as he does Messrs. [Walt] Nauta and [Carlos] De Oliveira, to take the fall with him."

"Good luck if they do. The best revenge for Mr. Trump’s supporters would be to nominate a Republican who can beat Mr. Biden. That’s the way to restore apolitical justice," they concluded.

Steve Thomas

[Douglas Caddy]

 

 

The Criminal-in-Chief is running again to be the Commander-in-Chief.

[W. Niederhut]

[Douglas Caddy]

[Steve Thomas]

Is Tuberville’s hold on military promotions so Trump can fill them with loyalists in 2025?

By Thom Hartmann July 29, 2023,

https://www.rawstory.com/raw-investigates/tuberville-military-promotions/

 

”The 2024 election will determine the direction this country takes, perhaps for another century.

Will we turn to fascism and authoritarianism with a military takeover, as a handful of activist rightwing billionaires and their wholly-owned Republican politicians want? Or will we turn back toward democracy and rebuild America’s middle class that has been so battered and gutted by 42 years of neoliberal Reaganomics?

To the extent that our institutions are still intact, that decision will be in your hands and those of people like you.”